A Radioactive Chinese will randomly do one of 6 things that change the player in some way:
- Atomic Inviso-Power - Makes the player invisible, like The Cloak Invisible.
- Toxic Mu Shu - Poisons the player.
- Szechwan Surprise - Restores a lot of health.
- Radioactive Energy - Makes the player move at double speed, like a Particle Accelerator. Also restores health.
- Thermonuclear Heartburn - Reduces the player's health.
- Filling... with... RAGE!! - Makes the Rage bar fill up to maximum and restores health.